Business travel can be hard without children but add four of them and the small feat of attending an out of town meeting suddenly seems like you need a cape larger than Superman. I've been traveling for business since my children were babies. They grew up on mommy being gone but it hasn't made it any easier on our home life. In fact, it's actually gotten more difficult with the increasing age of my children. It's not uncommon for one of my teenagers to ask, "Are you going to be here in the morning or at bedtime?" or my tween to request that I build a conference center onto our house for meetings so I don't have to leave. My children's desires to have mom around the house will continue to be a challenge, but over the years I have been able to develop some strategies to help lessen the side effects of my absence.
Prepare Dinners for the Week Ahead on Sundays: Mealtime is a burden for anyone and particularly difficult for the spouse or partner you leave behind. For years, I've been cooking meals on Sunday that can be served throughout the week in a variety of ways. A week's worth of meals always includes some type of roasted poultry, a pot of pasta sauce and some type of casserole. To make my departure on Monday morning easy, I prepare a crockpot meal Sunday night and plug in the dinner before I leave for the airport. A roasted turkey can be sliced for sandwiches or served with baked potatoes on Tuesday and on Wednesday my family need only to boil noodles to compliment the spaghetti sauce. Thursday is leftover night or time to order pizza. Of course, I always double my recipes and freeze half for weeks that keep me out of the kitchen.
Hold Weekly Family Meetings: Nothing is worse than a surprise event while you are traveling or learning that your children need supplies for a project while you are 3000 miles away. Our family holds a family meeting during dinnertime every Sunday night. We discuss the week ahead and I update the family on where my travels will take me for the week. I learned a long time ago that taking the mystery out of my frequent disappearance makes it much more manageable for my children and my spouse.
Stay Connected While On the Road: Technology has made it a great deal easier to stay connected with your family while you are traveling. I use Logitech's VID service, which is a free video phone service, to see my children as they tell me about their day. I love my HD Webcam by Logitech. I videotape myself telling bedtime stories or email video messages to my children. We have webcams on every home computer so that we can stay connected no matter where I'm traveling. Thanks to on board Internet access, I often help my children with homework via Facebook IM. It's not uncommon to see me on a plane solving math problems via IM chat with one of my teens.
Being Present When You Return: Business travel can be exhausting but your family will expect you to be ready to leap back into your role as mom upon your return. Find time on your trip to exercise and take care of yourself so that you can give them 100% when you get home. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables when possible, stay hydrated and wrap up those last emails before you open the front door. Your family is going to be excited to see you and want every bit of energy you have to give them.
Don't Dwell on Guilt: Yes, being away can mean missing some milestones and every day occasions with your children but focus on the positive. Your children will gain a strong sense of confidence while assuming some of the tasks you would likely be doing for them if you were home. I've seen my children proudly demonstrate their ability to cook dinner on their own and wash their own laundry at a very young age and as a family we've enjoyed amazing vacations thanks to frequent flyer points. Best of all, they've watched me pursue a fulfilling career and seen firsthand how happy a person can be when they are following their dreams.
November 11, 2009 8:26 PM | Reply
Great article on the challenges of raising kids as a traveling mom. I did it myself from the time my kids were 1 and 3 (they are now in their mid-20s). For more tips on keeping the kids involved while mom is away, see www.smartwomentravelers.com.