Musings from Jane Air

Lighten Up

2012-01-16T18:51:14Z

It only takes a few weeks into a New Year for most resolutions to become a distant memory. But this year, my resolution--to pack lighter--won't be put to the test until the first weekend in February. So I have time to practice and get it right.

It starts with the bag. If I have a large bag, I will fill it up. My brain takes one look and says, "Why waste all that space?" So I over-pack and wind up having to lug all that stuff around wherever I am going. It sounds like a good idea to have a lot to choose from but if I planned ahead for the outfits I was going to wear, I could save myself a lot of time.

]]> If I have a smaller carry-on, that means 1) no baggage fee and 2) I have to pack less. I am getting this down to a science thanks to Katrina Bischoff, founder of a-dresstheissue.com. She is a wardrobe consultant/stylist and her philosophy is to that smart dressing should appear effortless.

Here's her three-step approach:

1. Understand the itinerary. What will you need where you're going? Beachwear? Formalwear? Both? Neither?

2. Choose the outfits. Pick the outfit for each event and lay them out on the floor or bed (including accessories).

3. Pair them up. See what can be mixed and matched to reduce the amount of clothes to pack. If something has only one use, it stays home. Even the PJS have to serve more than one purpose. The t-shirt you sleep in can be the one you work out in the next day.

If you follow Katrina's three steps, you will not only pack lighter, you will feel lighter.

How to Manage Your Volunteer Expectations

2012-01-09T13:00:00Z

After spending a year volunteering abroad with several different organizations, I've pretty much figured out what does and doesn't work for me in a volunteer role. At times, volunteering has proven to be more challenging than I ever expected. Repeatedly, it has pushed me well beyond my comfort zone. It can be disconcerting and maddening and even scary at times. But every time I accomplish something I didn't think was possible in the name of giving back, I am grateful for the opportunity to test my personal limits. And I'm proud of myself - like put a gold star sticker on the fridge proud. I'm guessing every person has their own volunteering style, but here are a few things I've learned along the way when it comes to handling expectations.
]]> Spell out on-the-ground logistics. Example: When you land at XYZ airport, here's how you get to the volunteer organization. I want to know the name of the bus line or its number, estimated travel times and costs involved. I am terrible with directions, especially when I'm not fluent in the local language, so having accurate instructions upon arrival alleviates any post-flight logistical panic.

Be clear with expectations. As a volunteer, I'm comfortable working about 6-8 hours a day. If you make me work much more than that, I start to feel like I'm being taken advantage of. While I'm working with your organization, I also want to get a sense of the local culture, so I prefer five or six day work weeks (like in the real, paid working world). Work a volunteer to the bone and you can almost guarantee a decrease in productivity and enthusiasm. It's all about balance.

Be honest about the living situation. Don't tell me I'll be staying in a bed and breakfast, when the digs make a beer-soaked fraternity house look luxurious. I can live without hot water, compostable toilets, paper-thin mattresses, bed bugs and no heat - but only if I'm prepared.

Define the role of the volunteer. If I've signed on to assist a preschool class, I'm not prepared to come up with lesson plans or take over a class entirely when the teacher doesn't feel like showing up. Be specific in what you expect from me and I'll do my best to deliver. I'm not a mind reader, so communication is key.

Give me space. I'm a work in progress when it comes to getting along (better) with a wide variety of personalities and cohabitating in close, often very rustic quarters. I try to be as respectful as possible and learn from the rotating roster of global do-gooders I encounter, but definitely require some down time to process what I'm doing and check in with myself. I've run into several volunteers who operate on verbal auto-loop of all-about-me stories and have had to politely inform them that every single second of time spent together does not need to be filled with conversation.

Give me the tools to do my job. I want to do a good job, really I do, but if you don't give me the tools to my job (whether it's information, support or supplies), I can't be as productive as I'm sure we'd both like.

Volunteers, what else have you found helpful in your efforts to give back? I really like what DC Central Kitchen has done. This Washington, D.C. organization drafted a volunteer Bill of Rights so everyone is on the same page.

A Six-Step Plan for Success

2012-01-02T15:22:26Z

How do you create lasting change this year in the areas that we struggle with most? As always, it starts with a plan and to help get you started, here's a six-step plan for success:

1. The first step is to re‐evaluate the previous year. Start by asking yourself "How did it go? How did you handle things? Did you handle yourself the way you wanted to?" Find your answers using the areas we typically struggle with most.

Nutrition/Healthy Eating: How did you handle yourself with food? Did you do a lot of social/binge/emotional or mindless eating?

Fitness/Exercise: How was your fitness? Were you motivated, did you enjoy your workouts and did you get the results you wanted?

Stress Control: How did you handle stress? Who or what was stressful for you and how did you handle it?

Emotional Health/Mindset: How was your emotional outlook? Were you as positive or optimistic as you would have liked?

Relationships: Take a look at your relationships. Were they supportive, loving, nurturing or toxic and destructive?

Business/Finances: How did you do with your business and finances? Did you reach your goals as far as the growth of your business, finances and career?

Personal/Spiritual Development: Did you grow personally and spiritually? What did you learn and were you living with passion and purpose?

]]> 2. Based on the answers you just found, next determine what you want within those same categories. Here are some questions to consider:

Nutrition/Healthy Eating: Do you want to lose excess weight? Do you want to eat healthier? Do you want to cook healthier meals? Do you want to food shop more effectively? Do you want to take more time to pre‐plan your meals and snacks? Are you ready to end binge or mindless eating behaviors?

Fitness/Exercise: As far as your fitness, if you realize you didn't take time for fitness, what do you want now? Do you want to create a more exciting workout? Do you need more motivation? Would a workout buddy or new exercise program help?

Stress Control: When evaluating your stress, do you need a more effective outlet for better stress control? Do you want to learn to journal, meditate or to do yoga instead of eating or doing another destructive self-soothing behavior when you're stressed? Do you want to become very familiar with the signs and signals that let you know that your body is under stress to prevent the wear and tear stress can cause?

Emotional Health/Mindset: As far as your emotions, do you want to become more optimistic, positive, change your perspective, become less serious and have more fun?

Relationships: As far as your relationships, do you need to reset boundaries, would you like to have a closer connection with your partner or do you want to have stronger, more fulfilling and rewarding friendships?

Business/Finances: As far as business and finances go, did you reach your business goals for the year? Are you satisfied with how much money you earned, do you need to make changes within your business, with your team, with your marketing, your services, products or your strategy?

Personal/Spiritual Development: When you look at your personal and spiritual development, are you ready to commit to a daily habit such as reading something inspirational, leaning a new skill, starting your day with gratitude or meditation?

Once you come up with all those answers, be as specific as you can so that what you want becomes clear and it feels real down to the very last detail. The more clearly you can determine what you want, the more effectively you can create a plan to get there!

3. This next step is crucial but often overlooked. You want to consider every obstacle you may encounter. While money and time may be some obstacles you discover as you consider each area you want to improve upon, delve a little bit deeper and you may find fear, self-doubt and your current mindset to be the biggest obstacles of all!

4. Once all obstacles are considered, come up with a strategy to overcome every one of them. We often don't think of what may derail us or what may sabotage us. That's why when we're faced with those obstacles for the first time we tend to fall off track. With planning, we can fall of track with a strategy to get back on.

5. After you've discovered what it is that you want, it's helpful to set small, manageable goals based on what you want to achieve and the strategies you just created to get there. The reason why you break it down into small, manageable goals is to prevent overwhelm and encourage success. When you set a goal and you reach it, it builds your confidence and motivates you to continue. That's not to say the goals should be small...make them huge! Just break them down so you can feel a sense of accomplishment along the way.

6. Lastly, how will you measure and track your progress? How will you reward yourself? Will you monitor your progress and reward yourself daily or weekly? Will you reward yourself when you reach a specific goal or when you handled something in a way that made you proud? What's important is that you determine, set up and implement a tracking and reward system for many reasons. Besides keeping us motivated to continue, monitoring our progress and rewarding our efforts validates our progress and enables us to see what's working. It gives us a chance to "course correct" and helps us stay motivated, focused and on track.

How will your year turn out? While many things are out of our control, our thoughts, behaviors and actions are thing we have complete control over. Destructive behaviors can lead us to continue down a path that doesn't work for us while taking the steps towards creating new, positive behaviors brings us closer to becoming the person that's been patiently waiting to be unleashed. As always, the choice is ours. Wishing you a great start to your best year yet!

Tips to Redeeming Frequent Flyer Points

2011-12-28T13:00:00Z

If possible, I like to include my children in my business travel plans when it works for their busy schedules...and mine. I recently had to book tickets to Hong Kong for a business trip and thought it would be nice to take my two daughters along. Using the online award ticket tool on my airline of choice, I found three coach seats from Florida to Hong Kong in about three minutes for 120,000 points. Easy, right? For basically $100 in airport fees, I'll be able to take my girls on the trip. But something made me stop short of clicking the confirm button online.

I called an agent at the Diamond desk to explain what I was trying to do and to make sure this was the best value and class of service I could obtain with my points. To my great surprise, I was able to secure three Business Class tickets from Florida to Hong Kong and back within minutes of my call for the same amount of miles. Even as a million-mile traveler, I still had a lesson to learn. Of course, I deposed the overly friendly Diamond agent and learned even more tips and strategies during my short call, which I will gladly share with you.

The next time you are trying to cash in your points, remember these tricks:

]]> 1) Point Seats "Prices" Can Change Quickly. Airlines have a certain number of "point" seats on every plane. They also have different levels of point seats among them. Depending upon cancelations and demand, the availability of low point seats can go up and down by the minute. Check back frequently even after you have booked an award ticket. If a low point seat becomes available, you can nab it and the difference in points will be credited back to your frequent flyer account. A 140,000-point round trip ticket to Rome can fall to 90,000 in a day and you can bank the 50,000 points for future travel.

2) Flexible travel schedules help. If you are flexible on dates, try different departure and return combinations. Mondays and Fridays are sometimes the most expensive days to travel with points.

3) Try numerous cities of origination. For instance, I am departing from Miami but returning into Fort Lauderdale because lower point seats were available on the outbound flights from Miami. Also, try various connection cities for the same reason.

4) Check partner airlines. If award seats are not available on your main carrier like Delta or United, look at their partner airlines. My family used Delta points to fly to Russia on Aeroflot and returned to the United States on Delta. The agent can look at award seats on partner carriers and in most cases the required points is often lower on partner flights.

5) Merge points. Consolidate your family's points into one account to acquire the necessary total to book award tickets. There's a fee to do this, but sometimes it makes sense. If you have to purchase a ticket, remember to have the family member with the highest status buy the ticket so you receive additional miles in your account. Delta, for instance, gives 1.5 points per mile for medallion members.

6) Follow up. Always call to confirm you've gotten the best deal and you might end up with a helpful agent like I did. Thanks Camille, I'll be thinking of you when I recline into a bed over the Pacific Ocean, with my daughters next to me.

Are there any tips or strategies you've learned? Feel free to share.

Airport Security Line for Rookies?

2011-12-26T13:00:00Z

Is it too much to ask that you set up a security line for rookies? I don't mind taking off my shoes. I don't mind taking my iPad and/or laptop out of my bag. I don't even mind taking off my coat, scarf, sweater, watch, rings and bracelet. But I do mind getting in line behind someone who doesn't know they have to do all of those things.

As hard as it is to believe, there are some people who still haven't gotten the memo. They don't know that they have to strip and de-shoe. They don't speak the language of 3-1-1. Since it's the holidays, more and more of them are flying. And it seems like they're all in the security line ahead of me.

]]> Sure, there are the special lines for the special people. Uber frequent fliers and platinum card holders can walk right up to the priority TSA agent and be passed through to the priority security screening line where they join other veteran travelers who have the drill down.

I'm not that special. I don't even need to be that special. I just need to be regular. And get to my gate at O'Hare International Airport in less than an hour. It isn't such a big request. If the rookies--those people who actually listen when they're told to get to the airport at least two hours before a flight--had their own line they could take as long as they need, go through the scanner as many times as it takes to get it right and still make it to their gate on time.

Now that would be a present that keeps on giving to the rest of us.

Holiday Gifts

2011-12-19T13:00:00Z

What gift will you give yourself this holiday season?

Really? You're not planning to give yourself a give this year? You're feeling guilty about spending money on yourself when you are spending so much money already on everyone else?

Then you need a value reality check.

]]> When you value something, you are willing to pay a little extra for it, right? Whether it's booking the hotel with the great kids' club or upgrading to the extra leg room offered in business class on an airplane, you make the decision to pay a little more something you value.

This season, realize that you are worth a few extra bucks!

Holidays are a wonderful and busy time and in general, mom takes on a majority of the planning, the meals, the shopping and the cleaning. Those are huge responsibilities that become magnified when there is a looming "deadline."

If your gift to yourself is an event or even a product, it needs a date, a time and place. You already know that if you don't schedule the dentist appointment, hair appointment or coffee with friends, it won't happen! So write it down. When will you buy it? Where? Once you work out the details, it will happen and you will have even more to look forward to this holiday season.

When you spend some time or money on yourself, it is a way to value all that you do and you teach your family to value you, your time, your energy. That's a gift worth giving.

Mind Your Manners - Give Back, but Don't Give a Bad Impression

2011-12-12T13:00:00Z

I'm a stickler for manners. Maybe it was the 24-hour thank you note "rule" my mother imposed on me as a young child (which I still strictly abide by). Or maybe it was my years in the service industry where I saw the good, bad and the ugly of human behavior on a daily basis. The bottom line is that I try to practice kindness, tolerance and patience every day, and especially when I'm traveling.

Over the past few years, I've encountered very diverse populations during my volunteer travels. I've crossed paths with people of different races, nationalities, socioeconomic backgrounds, levels of intelligence, and those faced with unimaginable hardships. Despite our differences, I feel a responsibility as a global ambassador of the United States to put my best face - and manners - forward.

]]> Sure, the way we do things in the United States may have come under scrutiny in recent years and people have plenty of assumptions and pointed questions. Getting defensive gets you absolutely nowhere. Keeping an open mind and practicing cultural compassion opens the door to share a new opinion, have a conversation, and maybe even educate a curious critic.

When volunteering, I'm extra mindful to avoid American stereotypes. I don't pretend to know-it-all, nor do I speak 10 decibels louder than anyone else in the room. I try not to dominate conversations and never interrupt. (These are the top American faux pas' I've heard from fellow foreign volunteers.) I try not to be the guy on my flight leaving my volunteer project from Ecuador. As my plane taxied to the runway, we were forced to turn back to the gate because he refused to turn his cell phone off. On the second leg of my flight itinerary, another American insisted on using his BlackBerry during take-off. I'm pretty sure he wasn't so important that whatever message he had to send couldn't wait the short two hour flight. Rude people come from all places, but still, this behavior was embarrassing and didn't reflect kindly on me and my country. When I volunteer, I want to give back - not give a bad impression.

One thing I've realized in my volunteer travels is that once you strip everything away, we are all want similar things. We want to be happy, we want to love and be loved, we want to learn, and we want our children to be healthy and have an education. No matter whom you are, where you come from, or what your circumstances are, we all deserve equal respect. And respect means minding your manners.

We're lucky to live in the U.S. (more than most people will ever know), but that doesn't mean we have all the answers or that we're always right. Next time you're in a place is foreign (or may simply feel foreign - I feel that way about many U.S. locales), please keep an open mind and be nice to your neighbor. You may actually learn something from the person least suspect to enlighten. Remember, we're all just one piece in the grandmaster puzzle of the world and we're all in it together.

Top Gifts to Buy the Solo Traveler

2011-12-08T13:00:00Z

'Tis the season for overspending and overindulgence. From extra calories to over-the-top ribbons and bows, there's nothing quite like the holiday season to get you in the spirit of giving. While most of us are able to cross off the majority of the people on our gift-giving list thanks to specific requests and letters to Santa, there's always a few that leave us dumbfounded and staring aimlessly at store windows. While we can't solve all you mystery gift dilemmas, we can give you a few pointers on some of the most hard-to-shop-for people: the travelers.

What do you get the person who jetsets the world and comes home with rare artifacts from historical sites and designer goods from hidden markets? The solo traveler is fond of the unique and extraordinary, but favors two things among all else: comfort and convenience. Here's our list of the top five gifts to get the solo traveler for the holidays:

]]> Sofia Cashmere Cashmere Travel Set: Nothing says comfort quite like cashmere. There's nothing more unfavorable to the skin than itchy airline blankets, so send your favorite traveler off with a bag of cashmere, courtesy of Saks Fifth Avenue. This set comes with a blanket and eye mask, perfect for long flights.

Canon PowerShot S95: Every traveler needs a camera, but with so many on the market how do you choose just one? Go simple, yet elegant, with teh Canon PoweShot S95. This is the perfect sidekick camera for the photographer who wants a day off from lugging around the dSLR and extra lenses. This pocket-sized digital camera features a manual setting, so even the serious picture-taker will feel like they're capturing prize-winning shots.

Tory Burch Travel socks: While travel lends itself to endless experiences, it's also lends itself to a lot of germs. Sticky airport floors and lounges, and airplane bathrooms, can make some travelers cringe. Thanks to designer Tory Burch, germs stay off your feet with these travel socks. They are 100% wool and have non-slip soles.

Ona Venice Camera Bag: Camera bags come in all shapes and sizes, but typically lack style. Enter: the Ona Venice Camera Bag. Made of full-grain leather, this bag can fit a DSLR camera, up to three lenses, and small personal items (including an iPad, wallet phone). What we love most is its transitional quality - you can ditch the camera, shorten the strap, and wear this bag as a traditional shoulder purse.

Molton Brown bath salts: No one knows sore muscles and cramped limbs quite like the frequent traveler. Between the crammed airplane seats and awkward yoga moves needed to leap over the sleeping passenger next to you can cause anyone's body to ache. Traveling with bath salts is a great way to wind down at the end of a long trip.

10 Tips to Healthy Holiday Eating

2011-12-05T13:00:00Z

With the holidays upon us, we often celebrate by traveling to those we love, vacationing...and overindulging in lots of food. Is there a way to enjoy the holiday season guilt and weight gain free? Here are 10 tips that can make it happen

1. First, ask yourself what do holidays, time away and vacations mean to you? If you're a chronic dieter, time away often means time off from healthy eating. This "diet mentality" creates changes that are temporary at best as we find ourselves either "on or off," "all or nothing" or "good or bad" leaving a holiday as a prime opportunity to go overboard with our choices, our portions and our behaviors.

You've heard the saying "If you fail to plan then plan to fail." That's certainly the case when it comes to holiday traveling and eating. Where does the plan begin? It begins before you even leave for your trip. The planning actually begins...in your closet.

]]> 2. Here's a trick I stumbled upon in college and still use today. Remember the "freshman 15?" Due to late night partying, lots of unhealthy food, drinks and a first crack at near total independence, many new college students leave their first year of college carrying an extra 10-15 pounds. What I also recognized was that while I was wearing fitted clothes, especially jeans, everyone else was wearing...sweatpants. I also seemed to be one of the only freshmen who didn't gain any weight! Subconsciously, wearing fitted clothes provides a reminder to keep from overindulging. For example, would you overeat the same way if you were in a bathing suit? Probably not. So, make sure to wear something fitted that buttons or zips before you head out.

3. The next trick is called the "clutch trick" and this has to do with the type of bag or purse you bring with you to a party. Here's the idea. When you have a bag with a strap that you place on your shoulder or chair, you have two hands free to grab high calorie drinks and high fat appetizers. With a clutch bag, you've eliminated a free hand! Now you can have a drink (you can always have a seltzer which looks like a drink to avoid any hassles from drink pushers) or a plate of something healthy. Even if you do choose a few high fat, high calorie treats you've slowed yourself down by eliminating a hand to eat with. If you don't have a clutch bag, no worries, just tuck the strap into any small purse you have and hold it.
Here's something else to consider before you leave. Many of us anticipate the special foods that will be available at an upcoming event and want to "save" our calories during the day and "spend" them on all of the foods that will surround us once we arrive. Here's the problem. When we diet or severely restrict our calories, we may be able to tolerate it for a while but the more severe the restrictions, the more likely we are to bounce back...with a vengeance. Just as dieting leads to bingeing, deprivation leads to overindulging. In the case of saving our calories, we may get to the party, find ourselves ravenous, everything looks delicious and we wind up consuming much more than we bargained for. Basically, when we're over-hungry we overeat. Here's what you may want to try instead.

4. Have a light snack, even a mini meal before you go. Why? Your judgment will stay in tact, you'll be better able to make sound choices and will prevent overdoing it. Physically, you won't be as hungry so you won't be as tempted by all that surrounds you. Mentally, you know that you've just eaten something so you may think twice about going overboard. Also that healthy snack or mini meal of just 100-200 calories can spare you from taking in hundreds, even thousands of extra calories in excess because you preplanned and "spent wisely." Need some ideas? You can pair an apple with peanut butter, a container of yogurt or a fruit and a handful of almonds to name a few.

5. Next, you may want to consider how many drinks you'll allow yourself. Liquid calories go down easy but those liquid calories coming from alcohol also impair your judgment around some of the high calorie foods within arms reach. You can preplan your drinking too. Will you limit your drinking to one or two drinks? Alternate between drinks and a non-alcoholic beverage? Drink a wine spritzer to cut the amount of wine you're drinking in half? Choose whichever plan feels best and stick with it.

6. Before you leave for your trip, be sure to pack some healthy snacks and drinks. While there may be plenty of fast food and convenience shops along the way, chances are what you pack will be better for you than what you'd find at most rest stops. If you're traveling by plane, same idea applies. While you may have access to some healthy choices at an airport restaurant or store, long lines and other last minute delays may prevent you from having the time needed to get what you need. If you've packed what you'd need ahead of time, the choice to use your own snacks or save them for your trip is up to you.

7. During the meal: Be a "Food Snob!" Only eat what's special for that holiday, or unique to your destination. For example, let's say for Thanksgiving there's a delicious looking stuffing on the table that you want to try along with other types of breads and rolls. Since a roll may be something you'd have on any given night out, skip what's ordinary to allow for a taste of that special stuffing. If you're traveling somewhere known for a certain food, drink or dessert, skip what you'd ordinarily have at home to allow for the special treat. By having what's unique for the holiday or destination, you'll feel a part of it without "stuffing" yourself!
When it comes to preplanning, it's not just our food we need to consider. Often it's the situations-the people, places, thoughts and feelings that may derail our best efforts. For these eating triggers, we need a plan too.

8. For example, you may have a relative who shows their love and nurturing through the food they prepare and serve to you. Not wanting to hurt their feelings or have them feel rejected, you accept that love in the form of a slice of warm apple pie, an extra serving of mashed potatoes...you get the idea. Knowing that you'll be faced with these well meaning "food pushers," you may want to preplan what you'll say or do ahead of time so you both feel good about the meal and experience. Try out a few phrases and see if they work for you like: "I've been looking forward to your delicious cookies and I'm saving room for a taste" or "I'm stuffed now but can I wrap it up and take it with me for later?" They'll feel that their treat is so special you want to find a way to eat it while you can choose to do whatever you like with it once you leave.

9. If you've overdone it, you can always apply the three to one rule. That means, for every one thing you've overindulged in, make the next three choices healthier and better balanced. For example, a meal that's over the top needs to be balanced with three moderate meals. A food choice that's high in calories and fat can be balanced with three more healthful options.

10. Finally, if you've really gone overboard, evaluate what happened, don't be hard on yourself and put some closure on it. There's nothing positive that comes out of berating yourself and chances are, those negative feelings may just encourage you to keep overeating out of sheer frustration! Also, many of us take that "may as well" approach where as long as we've overdone it, we may as well keep going. That equates to this-I gained a pound so I may as well gain back all I've lost. Does this make any sense?

With a plan, the holiday's can be enjoyed without being derailed by all that holiday cheer as well as coasting through the holidays without the "leftovers" you'd see on your belly, hips and thighs. By putting some strategies into place now, you can finally have a New Year's Resolution that's different from the millions of others who start January 1st with a pledge to lose excess weight.

Mission: De-Stress - How to Find Balance throughout the Holiday Season

2011-11-09T17:29:12Z

I wouldn't call myself a Grinch, but it's unlikely you'll find me decking the halls or swapping holiday gifts. For various reasons (mostly stemming from loss), I tend to operate on autopilot and strive to achieve personal balance during "the most wonderful time of the year."

Whether you're fully committed to seasonal festivities (cheers!) or simply trying to skate by, I know I'm not alone in my annual endeavor to find balance and make it to the New Year unscathed. I used to give into seasonal stress, but I've since co-opted a series of take-care-of-me techniques to get through the holiday season. Here's how I do it:

]]> Find your happy place and go there. Whether it's getting a massage, going to a Monday afternoon matinee or walking the dog in a nearby park, pinpoint what your perfect storm is for relaxation and go there when you need a "time out." Consider this place your personal respite in the world.

Exercise. It's really easy to hole up at home in your jammies with popcorn, wine and Netflix. I'm as gym-phobic as a gal could be, but believe me, if you get even get 20 minutes of fresh air and adrenaline pumping, it does wonders for finding calm and balance. You don't even have to break a sweat, and I give you permission to make fun of your neighbor's over-the-top holiday light display.

Plan your retail excursions wisely. Whether you're on the holiday retail detail or just trying to buy groceries for the week, think about when you're going to shop. On the weekends, the parking lot at Target is pretty much guaranteed to be like rush hour gridlock. Minimize the chaos by shopping mid-week, during off-hours and avoiding malls for everyday purchases when possible. You do not need to increase your stress level in the name of toilet paper.

Give up the guilt. The holidays can be fraught with guilt for so many reasons. To tip or not to tip, who to gift and what, overeating, familial expectations and the list goes on and on. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself - it's the best you can do.

Volunteer. It always feels good to give back and there is increased need throughout the holiday season. Make a weekly commitment to a cause you support or give a few Saturday afternoon hours here and there. All the "do good" effort adds up and will help make a difference for someone else in your community. It may not seem like much, but the feel good effects are far-reaching and embody the spirit of the season.

Surround yourself with loved ones. As a work-from-home writer, there are times I feel like an honorary hermit. It's easy to isolate yourself when you're feeling overwhelmed, which may seem like a smart tactic, but it can lead to loneliness. Give yourself the all-about-me space you need, but balance it with quality time with the people you love (and make you laugh) most.

The Things We Do for Kids

2011-10-24T16:01:49Z

The minute my kids were born, I knew that I would always tend to their needs before I tend to my own. But it never occurred to me that I would travel to meet their needs rather than mine (or, at the very least, ours as a family).

However, that's what happened when my son turned 11. He wanted to learn to ski and he wanted to learn in the mountains of Colorado. This was not music to the ears of a flatlander mom who believes a Chicago winter is best endured by spending as much time as possible in the Caribbean. Colorado, I believe, is a great place to visit ... in the summer.

]]> But, my son wanted to go. So I held my nose and booked a long weekend family vacation in Vail, Colorado. I figured the mountain views would help blunt the fact that I was surrounded by snow.

My son is a teenager now, which means that dressing up as a dinosaur is no longer an appropriate way to celebrate Halloween. Now he wants to go to a haunted house and not one of those mild, okay-for-kids haunted houses. He wants to go to one of those so-scary-you-might-have-a-heart-attack haunted houses. Or at least I think they're that scary.

The truth is I have never been to one. I like the idea of a being frightened even less than I like the idea of buying a plane ticket to go somewhere with more snow than we get at home in the winter.

But, of course, I'll do it. Because we do things for our kids were never thought we would.

The Time Has Come to Visit Mexico

2011-10-19T16:13:10Z

by Carol Cain of NYCityMama.com

There's been a lot of chatter about how safe it is to travel to Mexico these days. The media, following a string of violence concentrated in specific regions of the country, has failed to communicate the facts to travelers curious about the current state of the country.

Thus, Mexico's tourism representatives have taken matters into their own hands and have launched an impressive media outreach initiative to help bring press (both online and print) to various areas of the country to help remind people why Mexico is still worthy of our attention, in a positive way.

If you are ready to ignore the chatter, and discover (or re-discover) Mexico, I would recommend starting in the beautiful area of Riviera Maya.

Riviera Maya, or the Mayan Riviera, is a located along the Eastern coastal of Mexico in the state of Quintana Roo, located on the eastern portion of the Yucatán Peninsula.

]]> This district historically started at the city of Playa del Carmen. The area stretches about 81 miles and in that stretch are some of Mexico's most significant archeological finds. Ruins such as Tulum and Coba, as well as nature reserves such as Aktun Chen and Sian Ka'an not only provide visitors with a glimpse of the landscape, all of it protected, but also of the cultural history so deeply rooted in the Mayan culture.

This is a place to come to if you are looking for a romantic getaway, a calm retreat with family or friends, and even more so, if you love nature exploring and adventurous experiences. Of course, if you are looking for a bit more of a night life scene, downtown Playa del Carmen offers plenty of choices from dance clubs, to bars, to restaurants all featuring the local flare.

Speaking of restaurants, another element not to be missed is the culinary scene in Riviera Maya/Cancun. This coming November the area will showcase their talents by highlighting several of the local chefs and eateries in the Taste of Playa event, as well as in 2012's Food and Wine Festival.

So, is time to visit Mexico? Yes, it is. Most resorts in the area offer transportation to just about any place you would like to go. I would advise using caution when traveling, just as you would when traveling to any Latin-American country. Hire tour guides for your expeditions, they are full of knowleged and wonderful stories. Be ready to tip everyone, as this is a huge source of income for the staff, and open your heart and mind to the beauty that you will surely find there, both in the scenery and in the people.

Mom Guilt and Shoes

2011-10-17T15:52:47Z

A hazard of the job: That you will likely miss something while away from home. Mom guilt - it's inevitable if you travel without the kids. Someone will have a meltdown, forget their homework or get an upset stomach.

And you will get that dreaded text from your child. She needs you. Right now. And you know you can't be there.

]]> What do you do? You do the best you can and provide all the comfort you can via Facetime, Skype, a phone call or text. And most importantly, you follow up. Once the advice has been doled out, find out how things turned out. Be interested. Just like when you are at home; maybe even better than when you are home running thousands of errands. Then, congratulate them for handling their issue so well - themselves.

I would not be so presumptuous as to suggest that a mom not feel guilty but I would suggest that you not wallow in it. Acknowledge the guilt like a pair of shoes that are kinda cute but not a pair that you would buy.

Then move on.

Tricks to Successful Carry-on Packing

2011-10-10T14:49:55Z

It's a common problem among all women travelers: how do I fit seven days worth of clothes, shoes and accessories into a carry-on bag? I'm here to tell you, ladies, it's possible.
I have one no-exceptions rule when I travel: If the trip is less than 10 days, the trip is packed in a carry-on. It can be done.

The required carry-on luggage size can't exceed 22 inches, according to the Federal Aviation Administration (international carriers may have smaller requirements). That means that between your handbag and your 3-1-1 liquid bag, you've got one shot to get your clothes and shoes in a carry-on.

First, lay out everything you want to take. Then, heed these words from Boston-based designer Tonya Mezrich:

"The key to packing successfully is to pack items that will be multifunctional- items that can be used in many different outfits. Make sure each item in your suitcase can be worn in more than one way, and incorporated into at least three different outfits."

]]> Take a look at everything you think you want to bring, then put half of it away. The remaining half should be pieces you can pair and wear at least three ways.

"You want to bring fabrics that will not wrinkle easily, and that are not too bulky to pack. I like thin leather, preferably unlined, so there is not that added weight," Mezrich added in my interview with her for the Boston Globe before her Boston Fashion Week debut last month. "Silk charmeuse packs tiny, but you do sometimes have to worry about wrinkling, so be careful to pack these items flat."

As for shoes, this is largely dependent on where you're traveling. Cold weather destinations require bigger, often bulkier boots and sneakers. Aim for one "nighttime" pair, one everyday pair and one pair of sneakers. You'll wear either the everyday pair or the sneakers on the plane, which will open some room in your carry-on. For warm-weather destinations, fancy flip-flops are always an easy pack!

The secret to fitting everything in the carry-on is rolling. Put the shoes in first, then stuff the sides of your bag with your undergarments (it doesn't matter if they get wrinkled). Then, carefully start placing your rolled clothes in the carry-on, stacking clothes on top of each other and fitting smaller items (tank tops, t-shirts, etc.) in the spare corners in the luggage.

You'll probably find you have room after rolling your clothes, in which case you can fit in your accessories, jewelry, and that one "I wish I could bring it" item that you had to put away at the beginning of the packing session.

Leave your computer, electronics, 3-1-1 fluids bag, makeup and books and camera for your shoulder bag. Is it heavy? Yes. It is worth it to not have to worry about whether your luggage will make it to your destination? Yes.

6 Ways to Make Your Hotel Room Feel Like Home

2011-09-09T13:32:54Z

Business travel can take its toll, especially when it requires making a hotel room your home away from home. Here's how six female professionals bring a bit of comfort and serenity to their on the road dwellings.

"Have nightstand, will travel" is Denise Blasevick, CEO of The S3 Agency's hotel mantra. "I take the things that are on top of my nightstand (like a picture frame, perfume bottle, or crossword puzzle book) wherever I go," says Blasevick. "When I wake up, I've always got a little bit of home within reach - literally."

]]> Travel expert and the Founder and CEO of In-Flight Insider, Carolyn Paddock has spent thousands of nights in hotels. She brings a bit of home to her hotel stays by packing one outfit that's completely comfortable, like in the winter, a fluffy cashmere sweater with a pair of favorite jeans.

Malia Everette has been the Director Reality Tours for Global Exchange for nearly 15 years. "I am very ritualistic about what and how I pack and how I try to bring home to the place I am staying," says Everette. She always packs a few munchies, like her favorite coffee, tea, miso, protein bars, fair trade dark chocolate and Trader Joe's Chile lime cashews.

"When I travel, I start by connecting with the hotel's front desk person who checks me in," shares Kyle Young, CEO of Multi-TaskingWoman.com. "I make sure I've introduced myself, learned his or her name and at least one thing about them, and share something about myself and/or why I'm in town." Young says this simple exchange is like making a new friend, which helps her feel instantly at home in any hotel.

As the owner of a travel business who escorts group tours, Deborah Mayer of Shop Around Tours Inc. spends a lot of nights in hotel rooms. Her favorite trick to feel comfortable is bringing her own pillowcase. "As a sleeper, I'm a pillow-hugger and I always sleep better with the feeling and scent of my own linens against my face during the night," says Mayer.

Marie Lotode Chandra, a frequent travelers and Founder of ViaHerWorld.com, a website geared toward female business travelers offers this tip: "It's nice also to listen to my own music in my hotel room. I always bring my iPod and enjoy hotels that have iPod docks."